Friday, July 27, 2007

Nicole Richie is ready to talk

Remember the last time Diane Sawyer had an interview with a troubled celebrity in an effort to clear the air- dispell some of the rumors? Remember what happened? Well let me refresh your memory.

Whitney "crack is whack" Houston. * all the good shit at 6 min.*

As it has already been proven true here at TGG, that God don't give a shit about gays. But if He ain't too busy running from Paula. I hope that he hears this prayer. "Dear Jesus, Daddy, and the Spook, it's Jigga again. I know you don't particularly care for my kind but here's hopin'. If you could possibly avoid Nicole Richie on the days of August 2nd and 3rd when she interviews with Diane Sawyer, I would really appreciate it."

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I am hoping that the combination of a long history of drug problems + a loser of a mate (dude from Good Charlotte) + being so frail + being knocked up + having to serving 4 days in the pokey + Diane = an interview of the same caliber of crazy as Whitney Houston. I know it's a lot to ask, (can something as awesome as "show me the receipts" ever be repeated?) but I really want to see the shit hit the fan.

"So God, if you could just stay away...just for a couple days, that'd be great. Just a couple days though, the life growing inside of her will need some help. Or, Nicole will need your help after the baby eats her vital organs due malnutrition. Oh, and if you do help me out Jesus, I promise not to put any penises in my mouth for a whole month. Amen."


lisa said...

my goodness jigga. i was feeling so blue and lowly, then you go and make me laugh! i will say the same prayer but will add "jesus, please remind the jig that you love him NO MATTER WHAT."

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