Friday, July 13, 2007

Here we go again!

Actors wanting to be singers and singers wanting to be actors is pretty standard, but there is one place in particular that seems to harbor the marginally talented singers/actors that we good people will have to deal with for years to come...that's right friends, you guessed it right, AMERICAN IDOL! American Idol is like summer camp for "special" kids. Ya know, the kind that tards , and the downsy kids go to. There is a camp director (or producer) telling all of these sad bastards, "Hey you're a pretty OK singer, I'd bet you'd make an alright actor too." and never having heard praise before, they all jump up and down and scream "yah, yah, yah!!!" ( But in that tard voice. Don't front like you don't know what I'm talking about )

And before you know it we are saddled with this kind of bullshit:

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This movie is so shitty, that it has past the point where it is enjoyable, even to laugh at, like Showgirls, or GLITTER .

And then there is this HOT mess:

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Somebody PLEASE tell me how it is that this bitch can't act in a movie about her OWN GODDAMN LIFE!!!! All of that baby makin' babies/sexual abuse/illiteracy/finding your way out of the ghetto with the help of kindly white folks, all happened to you Fanny! Don't you remember? How can you not manage to muster up some kind of genuine emotion?!

Not enough for ya? Well, how about this jackass on daytime TV?

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Again, playing a pretty piss-poor version of himself.

Get ready y'all, cause here it comes again! It has been recently announced that Katherine McPhee will co-star in some shitty movie. You excited Kat??

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Yeah? I'm not.

I get it though, you think to yourself, "What about Jennifer Hudson? She won an Oscar."

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Yeah, she did. For her singing, NOT cause she's the next Meryl Streep. Your singing skills are dubious, at best, Kit Kat. I don't think this acting thing is gonna fare much better. What the hell though, go on and give it a shot. It's not as if trying to cross over and bombing has completely ruined anyone's career.

I do, however, suggest to take a lesson from Kelly Clarkson. She made a REALLY shitty movie, and now, you hardly ever see her doing anything in public that isn't singing. Whatever you decide, Kitty Kat, do it fast! The clock is tickin' and your star is fading fast.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Bitch, I love me some Kelly Clarkson. She pairs nicely with Dr. Mario.

jigga the nigga said...

I likes your style anonymous. i likes it a whole bunch.