Monday, July 23, 2007

Amy Winehouse wants a baby in her box.



The singer/songwriter/lush/junkie whore is rumored to want to start a family with new husband, Blake Fielder-Civil. The celebmonger in me really wants Amy to be knocked up, but the concerned human being in me wants this to be totally untrue. I am sure that Amy has already listed the pros and cons of carrying a baby to full term. I just happen to have a copy of said list. I'd post the original but it has a lot of pee stains and I think she tried to smoke half of it.

Pro: Having a family is every girls dream.
Con: Singing, pissing my panties, puking in front of people is my dream too.

Pro: Could carry baby in hair.
Con: Hair falling out.

Pro: Baby could have my husbands eyes
Con: Baby could also have my snaggle teeth. And beehive. And alcoholic tendencies.

Pro: I would gain some much needed weight.
Con: How will girls, and my own kid know to look up to me? Wait, I ain't no fucking role model! Plus I hate bald peoples. but my babies would has my beehive, right? I still might cut it anyway. God, Im so hungry. I want a juice? with gin. and no ice. and no juice.

Pro:

That's pretty much all i could salvage. Well, there was a part where she was talking about a line of blow and a bloody fart...it really didn't make a whole lot of sense. I guess we'll have to wait and see what she decides. As if she could ever carry baby! Can a girl under 88lbs even make eggs? Put down the pipe and pick up a pork chop Amy!

*a few pics of Amy looking especially treated*
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

2 comments:

sarah said...

What?!? Oh, hell no Snaggles can't make babies, yet!?

mindy said...

Wow, she is so hideously unattractive, it is insane.