What does a lady wear when she is about to serve her mother with a letter from her lawyer stating that mom is to stay away from her children when she's on the drugs? Well, if you are Britney Spears, you are not a lady, so you wear a silk tank top, sans bra (obvs), and some dangerously short cutoffs that leave the frayed ends no other choice but to seek refuge inside of the Spears baby slide. And don't forget to try to get the frayed ends out of your vagina by furiously picking at your cave while you nonchalantly try explain to your mother that you, Britney Spears, deem her unfit. If you have some sort of sick desire to see what I've just described to you unfold, by all means, have at it. You will soon find that I've described this scene with an uncanny amount of accuracy. Let us not forget that we should have no sympathy for Mom Spears. If Britney was my daughter and she tried to pull this shit with me, I would grab her by her flydana and do what I should have done a long time ago...beat the ever loving shit out of her. Instead, Mom Spears sits in awe as her trashy spawn saunters off, still fussing with her vag. And there you have it. A day in the life of the Spears family. And with that, I'm off to order myself a flydana.