Seriously, what the fuck is going on here? I have tried to understand this for quite some time. How is it that J. Lo allows her husband to look like such trash every time they step out together? I'm glad you brought your feather quill pen and jesus dog tags along for the ride, Marc Anthony...sweet god, it just gets worse and worse with this guy. But I think I've finally figured it out. I think that J. Lo must wake up Marc Anthony from a deep sleep 5 minutes before they leave, and command him to get ready in that short amount of time. She will keep doing this until he gets it right. Think of it as being similar to what Chaz does to his kids in 'The Royal Tenenbaums' only SPICY because they are Hispanic. So Marc Anthony springs out of bed, throws on some wrinkled jeans and his favorite feather quill pen blazer and stands before J. Lo seeking her approval. J. Lo looks, shakes her head, and says "Get your ass out of this house and to [insert stupid event they are going to]! Prepare to be ridiculed by the masses...YET AGAIN! WHEN WILL YOU EVER LEARN! AYE CARRAMBA! [insert another offensive saying of your choosing that latinas would never actually say]!!!". Better luck next time, Marc Anthony.