Page Six Reports:
A shopper in Bloomingdale's underwear department recently watched the "Brokeback Mountain" star with a salesman "combing through every style . . . A good 10 minutes later, Jake was still at it . . . holding up a pair of tight white briefs that he'd pulled out of the package to examine, as if he'd never seen tighty whities before in his entire life. It was hilarious. He looked very confused and had a furrowed brow . . . He was examining undies like an anthropologist in the city's most highly trafficked department store."
Oh Jakeypoo, I'll help you find the perfect fit for your nice nice nice package. Seeing as you curve to the right, briefs will be perfect to help you slide back to center. I would love to see you in any of the above pair. And the butt pads just for fun. The skimpier the better.